| Saturday, December 10th, 2011 |
| 9:34 pm |
Headmaster!
What a pleasure to see you, sir! |
| Saturday, October 8th, 2011 |
| 10:12 pm |
New plan: get that plaster cast of certain bits of my anatomy bronzed. |
| Friday, April 1st, 2011 |
| 12:41 am |
What's that phrase again?
Bibbidi-bobbidi-boo.
Hmm. That doesn't sound like a proper incantation to me.
More fun than Latin, though.
True. Shall we try it? |
| Saturday, January 29th, 2011 |
| 10:32 pm |
Conversation at London Wizarding Security Ron!
We have news for you! |
| Saturday, November 13th, 2010 |
| 11:47 pm |
Conversation in the flat above Weasley's Wizard Wheezes A visit at home from our brother! We feel so honoured.
What can we do for you? |
| Friday, October 8th, 2010 |
| 3:21 pm |
Paper Airplane Note: Fred Weasley LOCK THE CLOSET |
| Thursday, April 1st, 2010 |
| 10:01 pm |
We've been having a wonderful birthday!
We'd say thank you for the good wishes, except somehow we haven't received that many...
How have you all been? |
| Wednesday, March 17th, 2010 |
| 7:09 pm |
Discarded: Schedule for Weasley's Wizard Wheezes, 17 March 2010 9:00 - Preparation (Mark) don't forget to switch out the Puking Pastilles display - F. 10:00 - Store opens 10:30 F and G arrive call at 10:25, late night for us - F 10:45 Hovering Horntail demonstration: G with F assisting 11:00 Nefarious activities, various, F and G in workroom 11:45 M lunch, F takes front counter 12:30 G and F lunch (out of store) 13:30 Nefarious activities, very specific, G and F in workroom Fred, don't let me forget the brassiere - G 14:00 Hovering Horntail demonstration: M with F supervising PLEASE GET ME AWAY FROM THIS HORRIBLE REGISTER, BRAIN MELTING THROUGH MY EARS - G No sympathy - M 14:30 F and G meeting with representative from Mannion's Magical Factory - secondary workroom 15:00 Mark off, Sandra on 16:30 Hovering Horntail demonstration: S with F assisting SALES BOY DUTY TWICE IN ONE DAY IS JUST CRUEL - G Stop whinging, you got to handle the money - S Mmmm, Galleons - G Do I need to write down some private time? - S 17:00 Sandra break FRED MINDING THE FUCKING REGISTER - G 17:30 Quiet time for poor ickle Georgie boy - S 18:15 Hovering Horntail demonstration: S G with F S assisting 19:00 Shop close - S on final cleanup, F and G to workroom In-store Floo powder needs replenishing - F |
| Wednesday, June 24th, 2009 |
| 5:38 am |
OWL POST: Bill Weasley As is our duty--
we are, after all, your brothers--
and the only ones who know how to party--
we have planned a stag night for you.
It's tomorrow night, so you'd better invite people fast!
(We got the ones we know, but we're sure you have friends somewhere, and maybe you should invite them!)
We're meeting for an early dinner at 6 at the Leaky Cauldron.
Bring extra livers, you'll need them!
Oh, and clothes you won't mind ruining.
F&G Weasley's Wizard Wheezes, all your needs fulfilled! Really! Sleeping potions, delicious (if dangerous) candy... Except shelter, we don't like people staying overnight. |
| Saturday, April 18th, 2009 |
| 10:24 pm |
OWL POST: Horace Slughorn Dear Professor Slughorn,
We hope that you received our transmission of a small payment two weeks ago to cover the cost of the staff's food during the break. We would be interested in making further arrangements with you. Would you care to join us for dinner at Maison des Hérissons sometime this week to discuss the situation? We are acquainted with the chef.
Yours, Fred and George Weasley
---
Weasley's Wizard Wheezes - putting the "bric" back in lubrication charms! |
| Friday, April 3rd, 2009 |
| 1:29 am |
OWL POST: Horace Slughorn Sluggy!
We never figured you for a joker.
But 4000 Galleons? Best laugh we've had all month (ignoring yesterday, of course).
F&G
--
Weasley's Wizard Wheezes - Ask us how to sneak our products past your parents and teachers! Or, ask us how we're teaching the kids to sneak our products past you! |
| Wednesday, April 1st, 2009 |
| 12:01 am |
OWL POST: Every wizard and witch we have ever met With our warmest wishes, a wonderful April 1 to all of you. We look forward to seeing you tomorrow, and long into the future!
All the best, Fred and George Weasley
---
Weasley's Wizard Wheezes - wow, a wobbling wart on your whatsis! What a woeful wedding of the weird and the the worrisome... |
| Tuesday, January 27th, 2009 |
| 11:22 am |
OWL POST: Ginny Weasley Dear Ginny,
It has come to our attention (probably one of the times you mentioned it) that you moved into a new flat recently. This requires a housewarming gift!
Expand the package attached to this note and enjoy.
With fondest regards, F&G.
Weasley's Wizard Wheezes--Just ask us how we manage direct Hogwarts deliveries!
A small package wrapped in garish fuchsia and red paper turns into a large wardrobe when properly charmed. |
| Wednesday, October 8th, 2008 |
| 11:14 pm |
Finally went to get a new wand today.
You saw what the explosion did to his head--imagine what it did to his wand!
Though of course my wand was half my body away.
Held carefully in his hand.
Straining, practically begging to cast the spell--
to let it spring forth--
But I digress! Alder, 9 1/2". Might not be as showy as my brother's, but a solid, reliable wand nonetheless.
He's just jealous. 14", ash.
Both dragon heartstring. But I've moved up in the world! Still alder, still dragon heartstring, but--11 inches!
He can only DREAM of eleven inches.
At least I didn't get a wand made of rowan!
What's wrong with rowan?
The Internet tells me it's ruled by Uranus. |
| Saturday, October 4th, 2008 |
| 11:49 pm |
[Filtered Post: Arthur Weasley] Hi Dad, are you around? |
| Wednesday, September 17th, 2008 |
| 7:52 pm |
Morning, all! I see my worse half is asleep in a chair--I must have been out all night. Nicked his computer. What did I miss? |
| Saturday, August 23rd, 2008 |
| 10:28 pm |
Owl Post: Molly, Arthur, Bill, Charlie, Percy, Ron, and Ginny Weasley St Mungo's as soon as you can. I don't think I can deal with this alone. |
| Sunday, August 17th, 2008 |
| 1:28 am |
Owl Post: Charlie Weasley  on not getting married! Two people joining their lives in matrimony is a beautiful expression of love, and we salute your choice to be well shut of it. Wedded bliss has no comparison to living in sin! As fellow members of the "responsible adulthood is for idiots" brigade, we feel obliged to offer this gift in celebration of your rejection of societal expectations. With all our love, F&G Weasley's Wizard Wheezes - do you want Fred with that? I'm trying to give him away[enclosed: a small vibrator with a number of highly interesting settings] |
| Sunday, June 8th, 2008 |
| 10:58 pm |
Patronus message to Harry Potter, Bill and Charlie Weasley Gone to Mungo's. |
| 9:15 pm |
Owl post: Bill and Charlie Weasley In place. New guards walking up as we write.
Distraction is prepped. Also, we're going to try the penis enlargement charm on the little one.
Combined with certain of our, ah, tricks, that should take up enough blood to make him pass out.
Or at least it'll be fun to watch!
Will start as soon as situation allows. |